Monday, December 19, 2005

amended addendum = duodenum?

The weekend has passed and I hope no one I know managed to hurt themselves in some sad, tragic attempt at skiing or snowboarding over the last couple days. We've all learned that you save your drinking for the final night as opposed the first night and then attempt to get up at 6 AM the next morning to get an early start. (For some of us, that learning was vicarious and that was for the best.) Note: My hope for a non-OSHA recordable incident weekend does not extend to anyone who was with people I know, but is not actually someone I know.

I have yet another patch to apply to my allegedly "controversial" and characteristically sloppy post about love. In summary, we can choose who to respect in a rational fashion. Respect must exist for love to be sustained. But, the decision to choose the particular person who is the object of our love is not necessarily a rational one. Now the amended addendum part. The decision to choose who we love is not necessarily an irrational one either. You can be in many relationships and never be in love even if those relationships had all the same tangible qualities as one in which you did fall in love. And yet you can fall in love and not necessarily explain why it was that person over any of the others. You may think you can, but your explanations will undoubtedly sound like incoherent babbling. Trust me. Not that I would know from first-hand experience or anything like that. Just some more vicarious living. With some actual living mixed in.

Bah, why bother even writing on it. Too many exceptions to the rules. It's like explaining English grammar and spelling rules to a non-native speaker. It doesn't make sense when you list it all out. It's just right when it feels right. And people (even me?), for all the rationality and self-control in the world cannot control everything we want to feel whether we like it or not.

Now the hole is even deeper.

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